so i was thinking about studying something "new" in my spiritual journey. i had all sorts of good ideas and thoughts that were fueling me. then i realized the dearth i was in. this morning, i had a cup of vanilla chai (one of my favorites), with a group of guys. it was cool as always to shoot the breeze with them. they are awesome guys and sometimes i don't know how i got pulled into their coffee coolness. 5am coffee is not for the faint of heart. anyways, back to my thoughts about dearth.
we were just talking about life, love and the pursuit of God. my mind was flooded with good thought topics about how to challenge these men with whatever stale bread i have in my satchel from last week. but there was a check in my heart, it was saying something on the lines of "don't fake it." it caught me off guard and actually silenced me in the conversation. i have been silent since then, only uttering a few words about the brisk weather as i left to come to work. when i arrived, i thought to myself, what am i going to read before work today. for some reason i decided to do an impromptu "love check." i got into the habit of doing these last year and it has been a while since i have since examined my life to the truth about love.
as i read i found that love is patient, kind, does not envy of boast, is not arrogant or rude, doesn't insist on its own way, it is not irritable or resentful, does not rejoice at wrong doing, but rejoices in truth. it bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
love never ends.
using this as a filter for my current condition, i was enlightened that i have not been walking in love. if i am not walking in love, how am i like Jesus Christ? i am not. instead i am walking in my self and enjoying the egocentricity of my life. it's all about me.
i began to think about how love should be like currency in my life. i should be able to possess it so that i can always give away the wealth that i have to all i encounter. so as i walk by people who are in need, i could give them something that would give them life and be endless. instead i give them something different to fill their alms cup. my raggedly leftovers. the comparison of value is immeasurable. rags instead of riches.
i once heard this story about a ragman. he would take your rags and give you something in exchange for them. by the end of the story, he had taken the bloody rags of the lame, hurt, wounded, dying, and oppressed and made them whole. i think that is what is so beautiful about love. it makes one whole. it talks about that later in the love evaluation. love is perfect and when it comes all the partial will be taken away.
thank you ragman for taking my rags because you love me. i can't wait to be a ragman today.
- peaks out.
p.s. - ragman story - http://www.ebe.org.uk/story84.htm
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